Jesus Loves Me... Even If I Don't Forward This Email

I'm not sure why, but I've never been a fan of those cutesy little forwarded emails. Not the ones about how we're all sisters so let's bask in our girl power. Not the generic forwarded prayers. Not the kittens in baskets (although the puppies and babies can get me a little misty-eyed, depending on the time of the month). It's not that I'm completely cold-hearted, they just seem like a waste of time to me. But the thing that irks me most is when people decide to send these forwards to my work email.

Why?!

There is such a thing as email etiquette, and it is especially important at work. Certain things are simply frowned upon, and for many employers, this is one of them. So if you are a forwarding fanatic, you may want to take the following precautions:

1. Don't send every forward you receive
I promise Jesus will still love you, you still love your country, and your luck will not suddenly spiral. There is no reason to flood someone's inbox with forwards. This is especially true at work, and doubly true for coworkers with whom you don't even regularly associate. Which leads me to...

2. Make sure the receiver wants your forwards
A lot of people do like the little inspirational poems and animated squirrels dancing, but there are some like me who don't. Try not to end up in someone's spam list because you decide you want to share with the whole company. At best, folks will just delete it. At worst, you could end up being reprimanded for abusing company email (depending on the policy there). But there is an easy way to avoid that...

3. Send forwards from your personal email to the receiver's personal email
If you have a couple of people who you share non-work emails with, why not get their personal emails and send them there. That way you get to maintain professionalism on your work email account (which is most likely being monitored anyway) and still share a smile with your friends. Everybody wins!

Are you guilty of being the forwarding friend or coworker? Has it ever been a problem where you work?

Afternoon Quickie: Never Too Late

I hope all of you had a wonderful Labor Day! It was pretty overcast here, thanks to tropical storm Lee. So I stayed indoors and worked on myself, inside and out. On the outside, I took care of my hair, face, hands and feet. Inside? Well, that's a bit more complicated. I'm reading business, writing... Basically trying to push myself towards the life I really want. My goal for today (and for life, really) is to realize that it is never too late to be who I might have been. (That's a paraphrased George Eliot quote by the way.)

Recently, I've been reading more and more about people who decided to forgo the "safe" path and follow their dreams, even when they were well into their 50s and 60s. Here I am in my mid-20s, why shouldn't I go for it? The thing now is determining what to go for and how to go after it. I'm seriously considering going back to school, this time for a Masters in Public Relations and Corporate Communications. Although some may see pursuing another Masters as overkill, I see it fitting perfectly in my grand scheme of things. For a while I beat myself up for not looking into PR while I was in undergrad (after I realized fashion design was out, I blindly chose business administration under the assumption that I would always be able to find a job with that). But I quickly realized that focusing on that bad decision would get me nowhere. Instead, I needed to find a solution for the here and now. Once I set my sights on that, things because clearer and I was able to start taking steps towards the life I want.

I'm encouraging each of you to follow your passions. Whether it is changing careers, going back to school, running a marathon or simply learning to cook a different cuisine... Whatever you want to do is within your reach. As long as you're breathing, it's not too late. So what are you waiting for? Go out and make something happen!

The Benefits of Joining Professional Societies

Whether you are still in college, recently graduated & looking for employment, or have already embarked on your career, you can benefit from joining a professional society. Professional societies are usually non-profit organizations seeking to further a particular profession, the interests of individuals engaged in that profession, and/or the public interest.

To some, membership in these organizations may seem unnecessary. After all, it is an additional expense (although usually the expense is minimal); plus, who has time to attend meetings and conferences? You're busy enough already, right?

Wrong.

If you are looking to advance in your chosen career, professional societies are a great way to achieve that goal. Here are five major benefits of joining professional societies:

1. Educational Opportunities
Whether you want to learn a new skill to make yourself more marketable or just want to update your knowledge about your field, many associations offer these opportunities through seminars, annual conferences, and webinars. There is typically a wide range of topics that are covered, so you have the option to pick and choose the training classes that are right for you.

2. Exclusive Publications
Part of membership for the majority of professional associations is access to their exclusive publications at little or no cost. This may be a printed journal, magazine, exclusive content found only in a members-only section of a website or emailed newsletters. These publications include valuable, up-to-date info on your specific interests that may not be as readily available to the general public.

3. Leadership Possibilities
Whether the association you join is a national, state or local group, there is a need for leadership. Taking a leadership role in an organization--whether it be board member, president, secretary, etc.--allows you to sharpen skills that may be used both in your career and possibly your personal life.

[caption id="attachment_1441" align="alignleft" width="226" caption="According to Harvey Coleman, author of Empowering Yourself, success comes in the form of PIE. Are you surprised by the percentages assigned to each attribute? This should let you know how important and powerful networking truly is!"][/caption]

4. Networking
So now that you've gotten the great education, kept up to date with the goings-on in your field and stepped into a leadership role, what's your next step? Networking! Get your name and face out there to let others know what you're doing and what you're capable of. Professional associations are a great way to do this. They give you a chance to connect with possible mentors, people with connections to get you to the company/position you really want, and/or folks to patronize your side hustle.

5. Enhanced Résumé
Involvement in professional organizations looks great to potential employers. It shows interest in and dedication to your chosen field, and it implies that you are knowledgeable about what is going on with your industry (due to those educational opportunities and handy publications that you presumably took advantage of). If you're up against another candidate with comparable qualifications, this could be the little push you need to sway a hiring manager.

If you're interested in joining a professional association but aren't sure where to start, there are several resources online to help you out. Here are just a few of them:

Weddles Association List
Wikipedia list of International Professional Associations
eBlack Studies list of Academic and Professional Organizations

 

When It's Time to Move On (or at least take a break)

When I was younger I had a bad habit of job hopping. Usually around the six-month mark I'd had enough and could just drop everything and leave since I didn't have any financial responsibility. Fast forward to today, and I'm still sitting at my 8-to-5 after more than three years. Not because it's my dream job, but because I have obligations that require real money. Yay, I've grown up.

But then there is the issue of my career. Real estate, that I loved so much.

Notice that it's in past tense?

Yeah.

I've been doing real estate for a little over a year and at first it  was such a fun challenge! Now... Not so much. There are several things that have me thinking I should step back from it for just a little while.

That feeling of dread
Whenever my broker's number pops up on my phone I get to thinking "What now? I don't even wanna know..." Usually it's not anything bad, and I already know this. But I just don't even want real estate to cross my path some days, which is a far cry from just a few months ago when that was all I wanted to do.

Avoidance/Procrastination
My cousin gave me one of his friends' info saying that he had "loads of money" and wanted to buy another house. One of my dad's coworkers contacted me about selling his house and helping them find another one. I've gotten a few emails from potential clients... But I haven't gotten back with either of them. It's a little bit out of fear (my first couple of dealings with clients were not the smoothest), a little out of frustration. I just don't want to do it, and since it's not a must... Well, let's just say if they are still there when/if I'm ready to work again, wonderful. If not, oh well.

Negative effect on my wallet
Real estate is one of those fields where you really should already be sitting on a nice little chunk of change before you get started. (I wish someone had told me that before I got into it!) There are so many fees and dues, plus advertising costs, gas for shuttling buyers to houses... It adds up quickly. And in a slow market like the one we are experiencing, it can leave you in the hole. If I'm shelling out $2500+ a year but only bringing in a little over $1500 in what may be my only sale, what is the point? Last year I was in the hole by waaaay more than I could actually afford. This year, I don't know if it's worth it.

All of this--coupled with the fact that I don't really know what direction I want to go with the real estate and knowing that if the writing takes off I'll leave real estate behind for good--makes me realize that maybe I need to step back, reevaluate the situation and then decide what to do once I have a clear head.

When do you know that it's time to step away from a job? Have you stayed in a position that you'd come to loathe simply because of your financial obligations? Or have you been able to break free into a career that you love?

Hot Links-7.8.11

We start with something truly outrageous. Michelle Bachman, along with other Republicans, has signed a pledge that states Black children were better off during slavery. No, I didn't mistype that. They said that BLACK CHILDREN WERE BETTER OFF DURING SLAVERY. Yeah, because that whole forced labor, selling people off like cattle, separating homes, beating for no dayum reason, raped by Massa with no recourse gig Blacks had back then was ideal. Cheryl Contee over on Jack & Jill Politics discusses.

Then something a little sobering--at least for me. Jozen Cummings (Until I Get Married) shares his thoughts as he approaches 30 and is facing something that I am thinking about as well: Switching Careers. I'm glad he did; he put my own thoughts and feelings about the subject into a much more coherent post than what I have sitting in draft right now! His discussion of talent vs. skill really hit me.

Fortunately the other links are not as heavy:

Clutch Magazine featured two interesting articles. Bisexuality vs. Sexual Fluidity covers a topic that I have had great fun debating with others, and Morning Motivation: This Far again spoke to where I currently am and the situation I'm dealing with.

Nothing is New on The Good Atheist discusses the discovery of what is believed to be a gay or transsexual caveman. Y'all don't even know how bad I wish History Channel, Discovery Channel, LOGO, someone would make a special about this! My curiosity is piqued.

Finally, over at Awesomely Luvvie, we're treated with The Bible, as Told in 2053. Or Through Blogs. I really don't even know what to tell you about this; you just have to read it for yourself. As I tweeted earlier, #slain, and #resurrected. Miss Luvvie is a certifiable fool!

 

So, ladies and gents, that's what's going on in my reader. What hot links have you come across this week?

The Creative Soul in the Corporate World

If I had my way right now, I'd be on somebody's beach in a house with the expansive windows open to the ocean, letting the sights and sounds inspire my painting. Or trekking my way through some foreign country, snapping pictures of the landscape and the locals along the way. Or in a comfy, cozy coffee shop laboring over the storyline of my novel. And those would be my work days.

I'd love for all aspects of my life to reflect the free, creative energy that I feel inside. Instead, I'm downtown in a high-rise office working a government job, preparing for the new fiscal year. Although my new position at work gives me a tiny little bit of creative freedom, this is certainly not the career I would prefer.



So what is a creative soul to do when life and responsibilities have placed us, at least for the moment, in the corporate environment?

There are a few tricks and tips that I've picked up along the way to make a less than desirable situation one that I can tolerate with a smile and (possibly) grow to enjoy.

1. Look for ways and opportunities to exercise your creativity in your current role.
The majority of my responsibilities in my new role are rather mundane. A lot of policies &

procedures, repetition, and dealing with other people's money. But there is a little glimmer of hope: the prospect to design a training class however I want to do it. Although it's not the full-fledged artistic life I want, it is a small way to merge my current reality with what I hope to be my future. There is a way to

2. Have something in your office/space that inspires you or keeps you mindful of whatever it is you love to do.

For me, that would be my notebooks. Of course I have the internet and my phone where I could jot down notes, but the pen and paper really do it for me when I'm trying to create. Having one of my pretty, fancy notebooks in sight helps me at times when I'm in a little funk. It keeps me mindful of the fact that I have a bigger purpose and destiny than sitting at the desk I'm at now. Although it might not be as easy for a musician or artist to keep their tools of the trade close by at work (if you have a job that let's you bring an easel or instrument to work, let me know!), it may still help to have something like a small picture you've painted or a copy of a demo cd, something like that. And speaking of my little notebook...

3. Take time to pause when inspiration hits you.
As I've stated in previous posts, my inspiration hits at the most inopportune times. Sometimes, it's right in the middle of a billing report. But I've learned to stop whenever I have that a-ha moment so I won't lose it. Acknowledging that moment is a breather, of sorts; a tiny escape from my routine. Then once my moment is over, I'm even more enthused to take care of what needs to be done at work so that I can nurture that creative spark into a full-blown fire. (But maybe that's just me?)

4. Use the job as a source of inspiration.
Maybe you have a wonderful view out of your window that would make an awesome painting. Or perhaps your building features unique architecture and you're the ideal person to photograph it. You may possibly have a cast of characters working with you that would make great fodder for a short story or comedy bit. Whatever it is, don't allow your job to just be a job. Look beyond that to see what could be.

5. Remind yourself that this does not have to be the end all, be all.
Sometimes, the best thing you can do for yourself is to stay mindful of the fact that you have not reached the end of the road just yet. As long as you're still breathing you have the opportunity to go beyond the current situation and do what you've always wanted to do. And if that is the case, why let yourself become depressed or frustrated over this temporary situation?

So ladies and gents, have you found yourself in a situation where you were working a "regular" job but had dreams and goals that didn't fit the "norm"? Or are you in that situation now? How did/do you cope with it?

 

On being a "corporate creative":  Ideavist: Corporate Creatives

What one writer discovered after leaving her job: Day Job Believer

If your supervisor is open-minded and always looking for improving his or her managerial style, you may want to share this link with them: How to Manage Creative People

 

YPW: The YP Bookshelf

*due to several factors I wasn't able to get this posted yesterday but I wanted to make sure I shared it!*

One thing I have learned is that no matter how long you've been working, how well you know your job, or whether or not you went to school for a certain field, you can always benefit from reading more about the business. There is plenty of material out there pertaining to specific areas (such as the two real estate books I should have finished long ago but am still I'm reading, The Millionaire Real Estate Agent and Shift). But even better, in my opinion, are books that teach you about managing your career and how to deal with different aspects of business regardless of what your business is.

Once we make the move to the new blog (more on that to come) there will be a section entitled "The Bookshelf," which will feature book reviews, discussions, etc. I thought I'd get a head start on that by listing just a few books that I think would be beneficial for young professionals. Of course it's likely that they won't all fit you, but you should be able to find something relatable in this list. It isn't complete, and some of them are still on my to-read list, but have made it here by virtue of the excerpts I have read. Full reviews coming later!

Already Read

1. You're Too Smart for This: Beating the 100 Big Lies About Your First Job
I wish I'd read this before getting my first "real" job. It would've prepared me for some of the things that I encountered as a fresh young grunt.

2. Who Moved My Cheese
When I read this in college for one of my business classes, it didn't make much of an impact on me. However, after getting out in the real world and dealing with change on the regular, this book proved to be pretty valuable.

3. The Girls Guide to Kicking Your Career in Gear
Great book on how to take control of your work life, even when it looks like the boys club has things on lock. I enjoyed this one and revisit it from time to time.

Reading/To-Read

1. Less: Accomplishing More by Doing Less
2. Z.B.A.: Zen of Business Administration--How Zen Practice Can Transform Your Life and Your Work
3. Crucial Conversations and Crucial Confrontations (complementary books)
4. 32 Ways to Be a Champion in Business
5. Surviving Your Serengeti: 7 Skills to Master Business and Life

YPW: What Is Your Online Reputation?

How fitting that this would fall on 4/20, as I see many on my Twitter timeline publicly discussing their drug use. Some even have their real full name in the profile. O_o

More and more, employers are checking out their employees and potential employees via the web. According to an article posted yesterday on Time.com, "A 2010 study by Microsoft and Cross-Tab, a market-research agency, found that 78% of surveyed U.S. companies examined the search-engine results of prospective hires. The study also found that 86% of employers reported that a positive online reputation factors into their hiring decision." They want to see "the real you," not just your representative from the interview. What will they find when they Google you?

Take a moment and do a search for your name. Go ahead, I'll wait. *plays hold muzak*

source

So what did you find? When I search my full name, I get my results related to my business: the real estate website & blog, a professional Twitter handle, and my LinkedIn account. There are also a ton of results that have absolutely nothing to do with me. Guess my name is more common than I thought, which can be a mixed blessing.

The Internet makes it easy to give TMI, sometimes without even realizing it. If you find some not-so-great results for yourself, you may be able to do damage control. Facebook is the biggie here. You notice I didn't list Facebook above. That's because I am militant about my security settings; I check, check and check again. So no, you won't find that by doing a public search. However, that is not necessarily foolproof, so you still need to safeguard your account. Un-tag pictures that may cast a negative light (drug use, extreme drunkenness, displaying weapons), monitor what goes on your wall (keep profanity to a minimum and discourage profanity and hate speech from others), and refrain from the negative comments about your boss, coworkers, customers, etc. I know the last one is tempting! But trust me, managers tend to look down on those kind of things. The same is true for Twitter, Myspace if you haven't stepped out of 2005, and whatever other social networks you may be on. (If you just must have an online venue to vent, I suggest a Twitter or Tumblr account under an alias with a different email address than what's listed on your resume. Can't be too careful!)

If you don't have much info coming up, or if you want to add more positive results, there are several things you can do. Create a LinkedIn account and be sure to update it at least twice a week. (For the uninitiated, LinkedIn is sort of like Facebook but specifically for the purpose of networking with other professionals). Do the same for Twitter. If you don't want to go through the hassle of creating two Twitter accounts, don't! You can make yours what I call a blended account where you discuss business and share select personal information (basically, remember yesterday's rule of not over-sharing and apply it here). You may also want to create a blog to get your name out there. Do one that is strictly professional, or follow the same format you would for the blended Twitter account. It may take a little time to get listed higher up in the rankings, but with regular activity it will happen. (Let me pause here to say that I am ignorant when it comes to Search Engine Optimization. I'm learning, but I can't tell you a thing about it right now, so do like me and do some research on how SEO can be helpful to you.)

Lastly, if you need help burying negative info that you have no control over, you need to bring out the big guns. The professionals. Companies like Reputation.com and Integrity Defenders work to bury negative info (because it's almost impossible to erase stuff from the 'net) under a ton of positive info. These people know all about SEO, search algorithms, all that good stuff. Of course, it will cost you and it can be pretty pricey, so this is not a quick fix because you don't want to change your Facebook privacy settings. This is some in-depth damage control.

So fellow young professionals, how well do you manage your online reputation? Now that you are in "the real world" have you changed your perception of social media and how it's used? Speak on it!

YPW: Make Yourself Marketable

There is an uncomfortable truth that young professionals--and even the not-so-young--have to come to grips with. The days of remaining loyal to one company for 30-something years and retiring in comfort off of your pension plan are long gone. These days, one must often move out to move up, and simply being "good enough" is not enough to get you where you want to be. You have to make yourself marketable, make hiring managers want you on their team because they see you as an asset. The most effective way to do this is through education and training.

You may be thinking, "No no no, I'm not going back to school! I've got all the degrees I need/want for this job." Understandable! I am right there with you (at least, for the time being). Although having x number of degrees is pretty impressive, that's not the only type of education out there for you. Don't think that you can only gain knowledge by sitting in a professor's classroom for a couple semesters. There are other avenues through which you can learn and make yourself more valuable to your current company, future companies who may be looking to hire you, and yourself should you decide to branch out on your own.

Of course, one of the biggest, easiest ways is by looking for information online. If you're like me, you've got access to (and take advantage of) the Internet 24/7. Why not take a break from Twitter to check out an article written by some of the leaders in your industry. Not sure who that might be? Google is your friend! Search for "trends in [industry name]" or "[your industry] industry leaders." The names that come up first and most often are usually the ones you want to go with. However, you must exercise some caution and common sense; there are scams almost everywhere. Beware of links that try to sell you something or that go to shady looking sites. There is also a wealth of information to be found in publications that relate to the type of business you do, such as industry journals and business books. Sure it may seem archaic, but crack open a book sometime to learn more about your business. You'd be amazed at the "a-ha" moments you have once you understand the ins and outs of what you do.

Reading and doing your research is excellent, but that's not the only type of education you need. If you are fortunate enough to work at a company that provides or pays for training, attend as often as possible. This is especially important when the training involves people from other agencies or companies, because they offer benefits beyond the obvious. For example, I am taking part in an Administrative Support Certification Program (ASCP). Of course I don't plan on working in an administrative assistant position for the rest of my career, so why am I taking it? Well, the obvious reason is because it will allow me to learn skills to enhance my current job and make me eligible for a little raise. However, the big bonus here is networking. Some of the instructors work or have worked in fields that interest me: grant writing & management, publishing, consulting, music! And some of the other participants are working in agencies that I would like to work for. I've even connected with other real estate agents and gotten leads from them. Networking with others gives you a chance to pick their brains for ideas that you may be able to implement, leads for job opportunities, and new lunch spots to try.

I would also advise not limiting yourself to the training your job provides. After all, what if your company can't/doesn't provide any at all? You have to take the initiative and find the training that will be beneficial to you. And think outside of the box! Are you in a position or one day hope to be in a position that requires making presentations? Become a part of your local Toastmasters Club. While it's not a traditional "training" you get the experience of making presentations, and mistakes, without having it affect your career. Find conferences and other training opportunities that interest you, then find a way to incorporate them into your work. If you're passionate about it, it will show!

Finally, find professional organizations related to what you do. Some of them may be free, or you can get your employer to offset the cost for you. If you are in the industry that you want to work in long term (or at least one you can see yourself in for a couple years) it would most likely be worth the annual fee. The benefits of being a part of a professional organization are basically the same as the other benefits we've discussed: networking (on a large scale this time) and more training opportunities. Even if you cannot find a professional org that specifically relates to your field, you should try a generic professional group, such as NBMBAA or Young Professional Alliance if there is one in your area.

To the young professionals reading this post, what have you done to make yourself marketable?

Young Professionals Week (YPW): Presenting Yourself Professionally

Although I am an artiste at heart, I am also very business oriented. One of my greatest goals in life is to help others, minority girls in particular, to understand and excel at business. True, not everyone will be an entrepreneur or even work in an industry that involves your typical "business." However, the majority of us will have to work for and with someone else, and in doing so we must learn how to present ourselves professionally. It is critical to our success--and our paycheck!

So how exactly do you present yourself professionally? There are a couple of simple things you can do to show the more refined, business-minded side of yourself, regardless of the nature of your business.

source

When it comes to jewelry and makeup, less is more.
I was recently in a training where an older woman had multiple rings on every. single. finger. Add that to the earrings, necklaces (yes, multiple) and bracelet she had on... When she spoke, where do you think all of the attention went? To the mounds of jewelry, not to what she was saying!  Accessorizing and using makeup to enhance your appearance is great. It projects the image that you care about your job and how the company is presented. However, too much of a good thing really isn't a good thing at all. Practice moderation when it comes to the makeup and jewelry.


Be 110% sure that your clothing is work-appropriate.
Whether you are working with kids, working with power brokers or working with power tools, there is appropriate attire for your job.Since I'm still in the confines of a traditional office job (for now) I focus on that area. Of course, your employer will already have a dress code--most likely written in the policy, but some places it is simply implied. If you're not sure, remember: if you wear it to the club, it's a no. That means the low-cut, super-short, and tight tight outfits are a no-go. After all, you're there to handle business, not sleep your way to the top, right? Also, if you wear it to bed, do NOT bring that to the office! Yes, I have seen some people in places of business dressed as if they were lounging around the house. I can't imagine they were there long. Please leave the sweats, PJ bottoms and Pajama Jeans at home... even if they are comfy. And guys, you aren't off the hook either! The loud Steve Harvey suits with the jacket to your knees? Sir, just say no. I would advise you to say no to buying them at all, but if you must buy them, relegate their wear to Easter service and the Playa's Ball.

Don't over share.
Sure, you're an adult and expected to enjoy adult activities. But do you really think it's appropriate to share how drunk you got over the weekend? Or how good your partners *ahem* skills are? Or how you're gonna whoop so-and-so's behind if they cross you again? Not in the office, it's not. If you've got a coworker that happens to be a good friend, feel free to talk about all of that after hours, preferably at happy hour. Better yet, leave the sordid details of your life outside of work to convos with pals with different employers. Be cordial, of course, but know when and where to draw the line.

Check and double-check your work.
The most important part of your professional presentation is how effectively and efficiently you do your work. No matter how polished you appear physically, if your work appears sloppy, you appear unprofessional. If you are sending out any written document, you need to double check for clarity as well as spelling and grammar. Make certain that presentations meet any guidelines that have been given (such as an allotted time) and that your message is clear and concise. Don't simply rely on spell check to catch errors. If at all possible, have someone else proofread your work

Of course these aren't the last word in professionalism, so what do you have to say? What advice would you give other young professionals? What, in your opinion, is a definite way to portray yourself as unprofessional?

Doing The Most vs. Doing Too Much

Lately I've been wondering if I've been doing too much to try to make it. IMO, there is absolutely a difference between "doing the most" and "doing too much."

For me, this is doing the most:

Working hard, or "grinding" as so many people claim to do. While I haven't quite stepped into the role of entrepreneur (yet) I realize that to get where I want to be, I have to do things that I don't necessarily want to do now. So I endure a job I don't like, persevere through a career I love that is at a stand still due to the economy, and daily come up with new ideas of how I can turn my real passions (writing and the arts) into viable means of income.

But I'm afraid I may have fallen into doing too much:

I wonder if this is me. Focus has always been hard for me and it's no different now. I know the end result that I want, but getting there is proving to be more difficult than I envisioned. So I try to take on more and more to make up for what isn't happening that I think should be happening. So far, this has lead to being super stressed, constantly tired, and getting a bunch of nothing done.

Does that mean I'm not built for the kind of dreams to which I aspire? Or am I just doing too much for the moment and need to pace myself? At this point, the answer eludes me. I've slowed down on some things: put chartering a NBMBAA chapter on hold, kinda dropped some of my sorority obligations (which I feel terrible about, but there's not enough Tori to go around), cut out the tiny bit of social life that I had. And although I don't have a choice with the job and career, I am weighing my options on the other ideas to figure out which is the best for me presently.

I'd hate to get burned out from doing too much before I get to show the world what I can really do.

My Current Motivation

Yesterday, as I began to prepare for my first listing presentation (yay, me!) I was suddenly hit with an overwhelming feeling of anxiety. Chest tightening, shaking, the whole nine yards. Thoughts of "What if they don't like me? What if they won't want me because I'm inexperienced? What if they ask me something I don't know? What if I miss something crucial that messes up the whole experience?" flooded my head, and in that instant I wanted to say "never mind!"

I prayed. I breathed deeply. I re-grouped.
I reminded myself that I do not run and hide, and that I could overcome any obstacle I encountered even if I fell and looked foolish a few times in the process.
I got back to work.

Today I'm still working on my presentation, getting details, running reports, making my presentation pretty and whatnot. I took a little break to look at a blog that I haven't visited in a while. I viewed some of the cards on Affirm Art and came across the affirmation I needed for today (and really, the rest of this very busy year):

courtesy of affirmart.blogspot.com

Although my plate is full and new obligations are being added to my calendar daily, I am happy that it is that way. Knowing that I am capable of dealing with anything and making situations work in my favor has given me renewed energy. I'm ready to work.

Tori D.'s Guide to Interviews & Job Fairs

It was hard as heck trying to find a picture of "black professionals."
What are you trying to say, Google?

As part of my 8-to-5 torture that sponsors my not-so-lavish lifestyle job, I occasionally participate in state-sponsored job fairs. While I am not happy with the idea of saying the same thing over and over almost non-stop for hours, it is a much welcomed break from sitting here banging my head on the desk.

It also gives me renewed determination concerning the nonprofits that I want to start. There are so many people who don't have the first clue about how to present themselves. One of my goals is to provide help for those who may not have had the opportunity to go to college career centers or didn't have family/friends/mentors to give them the Dos & Don'ts  of seeking an interview. Although I don't have the resources to do that now, I do have this forum to share some tips. I wish I could still get to my tweets from the job fair I worked several months ago, but of course Twitter makes it pretty much impossible to go back that far. Soooo here we go:

1. Dress like you expect a job.
I swear I've seen it all: pajamas, club clothes, dirty tattered tshirts, sagging jeans showing almost the whole ass... all of this at job fairs. I think most people just see job fairs as an expo of businesses that are in the area, not realizing that this is more or less a "pre-interview." (And for some, interviews are done on the spot.) Would you go to an interview half naked or with rollers in your hair? Okay, you might, but you certainly shouldn't! And while it is true that some companies have a more laid back culture, the first impression is a lasting impression. For an interview, you can sorta find out how the company culture is and determine whether a suit or "dressy casual" (nice slacks/skirt, button down for guys, blouse that doesn't reveal too much cleavage for women, dress shoes) is appropriate. For job fairs, it's best to err on the side of caution and pull out a suit (or at least shirt & tie for guys). And I know everyone may not have money for top of the line, name brand business attire. Neither do I! But JCPenney, Belk, and [your local department store] are forever having clearance sales. Take the money that you would spend otherwise on one club outfit, shoes, a fake purse & weave and invest in yourself.

2. Leave your "game" at home.
Hitting on the recruiters will not land you a job, unless they are really sleazy and hard up. More than likely, it will get you mentally written off. Who wants to be responsible for a possible sexual harassment issue later on down the line, especially when the signs were there from jump? Save the comments about lips, legs, breast, booty, etc. In fact, just save any comments about appearance. Unless you're complimenting the shoes. :)

3. Bathe & brush your teeth!
Okay, this shouldn't be just for interviews and job fairs, clearly. But if there were eeeever a time not to be smelling like onions, feet & sweaty sex, this is it. Not really a whole lot more to say about that...

4. Have some questions ready to ask, and think of answers to common interview questions.
Usually for job fairs, there is a list of the employers that will be in attendance. Select a few that you are interested in and learn a little bit about those companies. Then, when you're speaking with a recruiter, you can sound informed when discussion who they are and what they do. Asking "What dis do?" or "Who y'all is?" is a dead give-away that you have done zero preparation. You should, however, have some type of questions in mind. I usually go for questions concerning advancement opportunities, lateral moves, something to show that I'm thinking long-term with the company.

5. Cover up the tattoos.
I know that these days, most people have tats. In fact, I have one and plan to get more. But an employer will never see them, because a lot of people still view tattoos negatively. If you have visible tattoos, like on your neck and hands, consider using a product like TattooCamo when going to an interview/job fair. Of course, once you're hired, you may or may not have to keep tattoos covered up. I believe this is especially true in the medical field. After all, I don't want a nurse coming at me with a need in a hand that has a skull on it. (And yes, I've had an applicant with a skull tat on the hand say she was interested in nursing.)

6. Be prepared to tell what you're interested in and what your qualifications are.
Don't assume that a recruiter at a job fair will rattle off every position that's open and you get to just pick one. Know your skills and qualifications, and let the recruiter know what you're interested in. This will save time and paint you in a more favorable light than just saying "What could I do?" If you're going in for an interview, be sure to play up the interests and knowledge that you have relating to the specific position you've applied for.

7. Don't become belligerent with recruiters working for companies that did not hire you in the past.
More than likely, the people you encounter at job fairs had nothing to do with whether or not you got a job you previously applied for, especially if it was years ago. Jumping on someone's back yelling, "Why didn't y'all hire me?" is a sure-fire way to never be hired for a position with that company.

8. Remember your manners.
Bum rushing recruiters with questions or barraging them with a list of your qualifications without so much as a "hello" is not a good look. "Hi, how are you?" "Thank you." "Have a good day." These are little things, I know, but sometimes the littlest things can have the biggest impact. Remember to act the way your mom (hopefully) trained you.

While these tips can't guarantee you a job, they will certainly increase your chances. Don't say Tori D. never gave you anything!

Faith or Foolishness?

Over the past several months, I have been hearing a statement over and over: "Life is too short to work a job that you hate." It's resonated with me because for the past two years I've been doing just that. Although I've moved around a little bit in the agency and done several different jobs, I'm not happy here. I've gotten to that all-too-familiar point where I hate getting up in the morning to come in, and it's a chore to be pleasant to people because I genuinely don't like it here.
On top of that, there is the fact that working an 8-to-5 definitely limits how much real estate I can do. Sure I can go knock on doors, make calls and meet with clients after work... On one of the few evenings that I'm not in class. Evening networking events are out. I already miss out on some of the meetings/lead generation building because they occur during work hours. And then there's that whole life thing... I'd like to have one of those! Things would be so much smoother if I had time during the day to work on my career instead of being stuck at the job.

So I'm thinking maybe it's time to make that move. I say that by December, even if I haven't found a part-time job, I want to quit. After all, what's the point of staying somewhere where I'm not happy, don't have any clear opportunity for advancement (not even a freakin' raise--thanks Governor), and not in a field that I want to be in?

 

But then reality kinda sets in and I think about everything that rides on my steady income. Car note. Grad school since I'm paying (mostly) out of pocket. Bills. Having a little bit of money to put into savings towards a home and my non-profit. And then there's the health, dental, vision and life insurance that I probably won't get with a part-time job. not to mention the state-matched retirement fund... It would be crazy to walk away from that right?

 

I am so torn right now. Step out on faith? Wait for "the right time" whenever the heck that is? Suck it up and deal with the crappy job & do the best I can with the other? I know people always talk about having faith, trusting God/your instincts/the universe or whatever... but how do you know that, in doing so, you won't fail miserably?

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I know these don't really fit the "faith or foolishness" theme, but it's how I'm feeling at work right now

 

 

 



 

Priority Shift

When did it happen for you?
When did your focus shift to what you were meant to do and how to go about doing it?
When did you realize that it was truly "now or never," that if there was ever a time to walk in your destiny, this was it?

For me, it was this past week, when I actually took my first steps towards my career. I've finally taken my real estate exam and I'm now a Realtor and sales agent with the agency that was #1 on my list. Since Tuesday when the broker shook my hand and said "Welcome aboard," I've come to realize even more than before that this is definitely an investment. This isn't just something for me to jump into. And why should it be? This is my dream, something I've been wanting to do for the longest. And although "the best things in life are free," nothing worth having comes easily.

Now my time, energy, focus, and yes my money are going to something meaningful, not just the frivolous things I wasted them on before. It's like I've suddenly been hit with the fact that I really have to "grow up" as far as my work ethic, my spending, etc. Not to say that I've been immature before now (not always, anyway). But realizing that what I'll get from this is 98% dependent on what I put into it, that kinda changes my perspective. And what's crazy is that I'm sooo lazy, like the ultimate couch potato. I love just lounging around doing nothing until I get bored and have to go shopping... or eating. But when it comes to work, to grinding and getting mine, I have no problem doing just that because I know nothing is just gonna fall in my lap. And now that I have this extra push, this career where I determine my own success? I'm in beast mode; unstoppable.

Randomness: Because I'm a bit scatterbrained, and that's okay...

1. I will admit, I am not the most proactive or creative person when it comes to addressing social issues. (Shocking, I'm sure) However, I am all for getting involved and supporting whatever endeavor I can. That being said, I am asking everyone to support my fellow blogger, JG over at One Fourth Random. She is raising money through December 25 to donate computers to her local library in Atlanta. (Read all about it here.) Now if I can donate something with my meager little income, surely you can! It only takes a second to do, and you'll be helping a good cause.

I'll leave this widget up at the bottom of the page, so you can come through and donate at any time! I'm sure she (and the children she's helping) will really appreciate it. And hopefully this will inspire others to get involved in their community in some way and make a difference.

2. Really random, I know, but I love this commercial!

The Queen looks absolutely beautiful (hair, makeup, clothing, the whole nine!) and Usher looks delicious. ^_^ That's really all I have on that...

3. A new career possibility has come up and I'm kinda excited about it! I won't go too much into it, but it would give me a base for one of the non-profits that I want to start as well as pad my own pockets pretty nicely... More on that as it comes.... But if I got this opportunity, I may end up moving to the city where one of my exes is and that could go either way. We've kinda talked and I'm anxious to see what--if anything--comes of it. Of course, I know I said I would use this time to focus on me, and I am. Besides, it would be at least several months before I would be out there. But I've been listening to his music (Google is the debbil y'all, I swear) and feel myself melting, like "This is what did it in the first place..." And before anyone thinks it, NO I would not be going out there for him! There are two other cities of interest where I could end up... This is just my first choice....

4. Speaking of music, I have definitely hit a sweet spot! Writer's block what? I feel like I'm not even writing really; the songs are just jumping out AT ME! I love it! I've come to realize something: I could never be an R&B artist. Although I've never really tried to classify my music, I know it doesn't fit the usual formula for popular R&B today. It has more of a jazzy/neo-soul type feel to it. And I'm definitely okay with that! (Plus, I don't dance. *shrug*)

5. To end, you know I have to get in a quote or two. These are courtesy of Anais Nin.

“How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself.” 

“I am an excitable person who only understands life lyrically, musically, in whom feelings are much stronger than reason. I am so thirsty for the marvelous that only the marvelous has power over me. Anything I can not transform into something marvelous, I let go. Reality doesn't impress me. I only believe in intoxication, in ecstasy, and when ordinary life shackles me, I escape, one way or another. No more walls.”

Acting on faith or Acting prematurely?

For a while, I have tried to figure out the difference, or whether there is a difference, between the two. I know what faith is (Webster's definition: "confidence or trust in a person or thing; belief that is not based on proof." Biblical definition: "substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.") and although I do struggle with it from time to time, I do *think* I have faith in most situations. And in having faith, I try to act on it.



Case in point: I've applied for yet another job, this time in Jackson. Looking at the qualifications and job description, I know I can do this job. I truly believe this is the job for me for right now, and I have faith that I will get this job. (I have that pit of my stomach, gut-feeling that I've gotten for just about every job I've actually gotten.) So, since I believe I am claiming it as MY JOB, I've already set up a budget & my plan for paying off bills. I've determined how much longer I will stay with my folks and have started looking at apartments I could afford on my own. I've started researching the different departments and people I will have to interact with and picking out new little office items I'd like to have when I move. I've started cleaning a few things out and off of my desk, filing some things away, showing others where things are and how to do certain things that I do.



However, today I stopped and asked myself: Am I acting on faith? Or am I merely getting overly excited and "counting my chickens before they hatch" as the old saying goes? I want to believe that I am being led to do all of this because I won't be at this current job much longer, but will be at a new agency instead. But how do I know whether I'm jumping the gun?

I would hate to think that I'm setting myself up for failure, but it is a possibility. How many times do we set ourselves up like that, whether it be with jobs, relationships, etc.? We expect certain things, count on certain things happening and act accordingly. So when things don't go as planned, have we made the disappointment even worse on ourselves by acting on our expectations and our faith, or were we justified in doing so? And how do you know when it really is faith and not just excitement & being anxious to make something happen whether it's meant to be or not.

These are just my musings on the subject. I don't have any answers, which is really too bad considering I need some.

"Tori D. needs a new career" -or- "MAKE YOUR OWN &#$@!%*&!$^#& COPIES!!"

I am in a very familiar place right now. That place would be discontent.

Tomorrow will mark my tenth month at my current job. Which means I am four months overdue for a switch. Within six months of starting a job I start feeling an itch, a jittery feeling that says I need to get outta dodge, NOW! I was determined to try to make this last at least a year just to prove that I do have some kind of staying power. And I am so close! But as close as I am, I am frustrated beyond belief.

Right now I am an administrative assistant working for a small State agency. It is a decent job. Nowhere near as stressful as my previous job (I worked in a call center- bleh), a lot more laid back, more flexibility. Paid time off from the day I started. Decent benefits. I have perks that have nothing to do with the actual job itself, such as being able to ride to work with my mom (and save my gas) since she works across the street from me, and having time to do nothing, like I'm basically doing now.

But the reason I'm so ready to move on is because I feel like my true skills, talents and education are not being put to use. I mean really, I did not go to school and get a degree to take someone's messages or run off copies. But that's what I spend the majority of my day doing. WHY??

So now it's time to figure out what I want to do. I do not want another job; I want to find my career. I'm tired of working just to pay bills. I want to do something I love. The problem with that: I'm not sure what that is!

Last Wednesday night I was sitting in my finance class (this is my first semester back in school; I'm working on my MBA) . I was sort of spaced out, and all of the sudden I had a very scary epiphany: I wasn't supposed to be there!! Like seriously, I realized I hate just about everything that has to do with business. Of course, the timing for this realization sucked, as I already have my Bachelors degree in Business Administration. But it's left me with a feeling of "Now what?" Where do I go from here? Do I have to start all over? I really don't think I can go the school route again.

I've been looking at different careers that may work for me. While none of them have me tingling with excitement, I think maybe they'll give me the freedom I want with the income to sustain me.

1. Grant Writer. Of course this would've been better if I'd been an English major, but I still have the skills needed to make this work. I figure with a couple of classes, this should be great for me. I just wonder would I get bogged down on the research aspect of it.


2. Real Estate Agent. Although I do not usually like sales, the thought of selling houses interests me. With houses, you're not pushing something on someone that they don't actually want. If someone comes to an agent about a house, they generally mean business and at least have an idea of what they want. Plus I did well in my Principles of Real Estate course in undergrad; my professor said it was something I should look into. Maybe he was right.


3. Journalist. Another of those "I should've been a _____ major" cases. I'm not sure what type or area of journalism I'd want to get into, but at one point I did have dreams of becoming Editor-In-Chief of a major magazine like Essence or Ebony.


4. Publishing. I am a complete bibliophile. I think one of the greatest things ever would be to put out my own book (which I plan on doing soon anyway; details to come). So I think it would be fun to get into that. Of course, that would mean starting all over basically, including moving to a larger area since there's really nothing here for that. This one is more of a distant option.


5. Web developer/desktop publisher. I was surprised at the number of businesses in this area who do not have websites or decent flyers, business cards, pamphlets, etc. There is a need for all of this and I think it would be a successful career move. However, if I went into this I'd have to partner up with a lot of people since I am not the best as far as graphic design, etc. But it is a definite possibility.


6. Event/Wedding planner. For some reason, I can organize things for other people a lot easier than I can for myself. This includes putting together events. And if I were truly a people person, this would be great! But with my temperament and disposition, this may not actually be a good idea...

So I really just don't know. I'm being pulled in so many directions that I'm not sure what to do. I'm praying, researching, praying again. I'm thankful for this job, but I know there has to be something better for me.

BTW, at one point in time I did have a passion. Fashion design. Since one fateful night in 7th grade when I saw a fashion show televised on CBS, I knew that was what I wanted to do. So what happened? Well, I got pressured into doing something more "realistic." Instead of going to an art school (I heart SCAD) or a university that offered something comparable to what I wanted, I ended up going to a state institution where no such thing was available. The closest thing was a general Art degree. And then it was, "Well you can't do anything with an art degree." So by my second year I said "F it" and went into business.... So, yeah, that's what happened.

Aight, time for me to go sit in this class where I don't belong.