An Indifferent God?

There’s never been a time in my life that I questioned the existence of God. Although as a child I was taught not to question anything I was told about God and the word, I find myself with more and more inquiries. I have, and still do, question the logic and truthfulness of some of the things in the Bible. And even though I practice Christianity I feel that all religions have their validity.

The latest in my list of religious rhetorical questions: what if God is just indifferent to our lives? Like the little day to day minutia of it all. The things we pray about but never seem to get anywhere with. What if it all is just a matter of luck? Or a matter of what you do to make things happen?

The thing that got me thinking about this today was reading about a young woman who started a cosmetic company that has been picked up by Macy’s. How did she get her startup money? She just happened to be in the audience the day Oprah gave everyone a brand new car. (Y’all remember: “You get a car! And you get a car! Everyone gets a new caaaarrrr!” *in my Oprah voice*) Since she had a car, she sold that one and had the money to pursue her dream.

Her story is absolute awesome sauce, the stuff that dreams are made of. But my question is why are some people recipients of such amazing fortune and others are left to scuffle to make ends meet? Why are some people blessed with great families and some with those plagued by abuse or addiction or poverty? Why do some folks have a string of bad luck and others seemingly are cruising down Easy Street?

I’ve heard preachers proselytizing that to be blessed you have to be living according to the Bible. Just yesterday the preacher mentioned how John said that he received everything he asked from God, and that if we aren’t receiving everything we ask then apparently something is wrong with us. But how does that explain the folks who are living good and never asked God for anything because they don’t even believe in Him? Or the millionaires and billionaires who attained their riches by cheating others? How does that explain folks who are living the best that they can and try to follow the scriptures but still struggle financially, physically, emotionally, etc. all throughout life? I can’t reconcile that idea of how good you are equates to how good you live when reality is showing me a completely different story.

So I’m thinking maybe God really just doesn’t care. Sure, He cares about the stuff like your soul, but whether or not you recover from that tumor that’s causing indescribably painful headaches or ever find someone who truly loves you or recover from a traumatic incident… Well, maybe that’s on his clutter list. I’m thinking He’s left it all up to us and fate to make something happened.